Coffee Crisp Update
10:44 on Wednesday, March 20, 2002 • Comment
An etherf@rm reader emailed me last night informing me that Nestlé has released a ”Nestlé Mocha Crisp” candybar in the U.S., suggesting that this new candybar might represent a conflict of interest for a potential Coffee Crisp takeover rollout. I was heartened to hear from the author of this email that “the Nestle Crunch Mocha is a little too wussy—too creamy, not caffeine-y enough.”
While I’m almost positive that Nestlé uses the same synthetic (acrylic?) coffee mocha mixture in Coffee Crisp as it does in Crunch Mocha, I’m very glad that the overall impressions of Crunch Mocha seems to indicate that it is, for all intents and purposes, a “wussy” candybar. A coffee crisp wannabe, if you will.
I have also received email from the Nestlé compound:
March 13, 2002
Dear Nestlé Consumer,
Thank you for contacting us about COFFEE CRISP.
Coffee Crisp, a product of Nestlé Canada, is available through a special broker, Del Mar International, to consumers in the United States. It is available for shipping by the case. Please call toll free: 1-800- 278-6253.
This is good news, I suppose, but only if local gas stations and supermarkets start buying cases. Shit, there’s no way in hell I’m going to buy a full case of Coffee Crisp. I’m just a casual user, man, not an addict. [ like hell—a case of these things would be gone in less than 24 hours+69 ]
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